Windows 2000 Source Code /*humor*/

Discussion in 'Болталка' started by VDShark, 4 Feb 2007.

  1. VDShark

    VDShark Elder - Старейшина

    Joined:
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    Может тема и старая, но мне ток что кинули, мне понравилось (посмеялся от души) :) Так что сильно не пинайте...



    From: Undisclosed
    Sent: Friday, February 18, 2000 12:55 PM
    To: Various

    /* Source Code to Windows 2000 */

    Code:
               #include "win31.h"
               #include "win95.h"
               #include "win98.h"
               #include "workst~1.h"
               #include "evenmore.h"
               #include "oldstuff.h"
               #include "billrulz.h"
               #include "monopoly.h"
               #define INSTALL = HARD
     
               char make_prog_look_big[1600000];
               void main()
               {
                   while(!CRASHED)
                   {
                       display_copyright_message();
                       display_bill_rules_message();
                       do_nothing_loop();
                       if (first_time_installation)
                       {
                           make_50_megabyte_swapfile();
                           do_nothing_loop();
                           totally_screw_up_HPFS_file_system();
                           search_and_destroy_the_rest_of_OS/2();
                           make_futile_attempt_to_damage_Linux();
                           disable_Netscape();
                           disable_RealPlayer();
                           disable_Lotus_Products();
                           hang_system();
                       }
     
                       write_something(anything);
                       display_copyright_message();
                       do_nothing_loop();
                       do_some_stuff();
     
                       if (still_not_crashed)
                       {
                           display_copyright_message();
                           do_nothing_loop();
                           basically_run_windows_3.1();
                           do_nothing_loop();
                           do_nothing_loop();
                       }
                   }
     
                   if (detect_cache())
                       disable_cache();
     
                   if (fast_cpu())
                   {
                        set_wait_states(lots);
                        set_mouse(speed, very_slow);
                        set_mouse(action, jumpy);
                        set_mouse(reaction, sometimes);
                   }
     
                   /* printf("Welcome to Windows 3.1");    */
                   /* printf("Welcome to Windows 3.11");   */
                   /* printf("Welcome to Windows 95");     */
                   /* printf("Welcome to Windows NT 3.0"); */
                   /* printf("Welcome to Windows 98");     */
                   /* printf("Welcome to Windows NT 4.0"); */
                   printf("Welcome to Windows 2000");
     
                   if (system_ok())
                       crash(to_dos_prompt)
                   else
                       system_memory = open("a:\swp0001.swp", O_CREATE);
     
                   while(something)
                   {
                       sleep(5);
                       get_user_input();
                       sleep(5);
                       act_on_user_input();
                       sleep(5);
                   }
                   create_general_protection_fault();
               }